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Friday, July 10, 2009

Bring on Season 11 - Jun Song's Take on The Big Brother 11 Premiere

Dishers, Please Welcome Jun Song, winner of Big Brother 4, who will be blogging with BBDish this season. - Carolyn

I have a confession. I’ve always watched Big Brother premieres solo…at home…with greasy takeout and the remote handy so I could pause and rewind at will.

But this premiere, I surrounded myself with a boatload of former houseguests (Monica BB2, Alex BB9, April BB9, Will BB4, Michelle BB10…and even some former Survivor and The Amazing Race contestants.

Janelle P. threw a little bash at her place and I had no idea what to expect…but what’s new…expect the unexpected right? “…whether you are expecting the unexpected or…just expecting…”

Ugh, SHUT UP Chenbot.

I am in love with Chenbot’s wardrobe stylist.

I always said I wish I could be a colorist at a hair salon for a day…just so I could f*ck with people who deserved it so they walked out with green hair.

Chenbot’s dress today was the equivalent of green hair.

And her legs still look shiny as hell, like her water broke early.

This is a pet peeve of mine…you can’t have super matte makeup and lubed-up legs, it’s wrong.

So…with margaritas, wine, champagne and SoCo flowing, we all sat down to BIG BROTHER 11!!!

You know what was really nice to hear tonight? “12 complete strangers…”

THANK YOU CBS for bringing it back old school and throwing strangers back in. I don’t know about the concept of clique-immunity though…but that’s just the former HG in me talking.

If I were IN the house I would HATE It. But watching it sure will be fun!


Jeff: Cute…guys’ guy. Except, I think he manscapes…his brows look threaded. Jordan likes him…maybe she’ll stick her booger on him, ew.

Russell: Did anyone tell him this was a game of social intelligence and not REALLY a fighting match? I wonder how he’ll react to the fact that he’s now the Smaller Love Muscle now that Jessie is in the house.

Natalie: Wake me up when she gets interesting. She lies about her age…which is kind of pointless…she lies about her athleticism…which is kind of risky…because no one wants to be around a LIAR. Has she not watched Jim Carrey?

Speaking of which, where the hell has Jim Carrey been lately?!

Ronnie: Awww, it’s nice to see someone BB-obsessed actually get a chance to enter the house. If he knew his shit though he’d know Michelle (Season 4) was the youngest houseguest ever. Ugh. Amateur.

Michelle: Aw…she’s so screwed. Very cute. She’s gonna be a cryer I think. Good call on downplaying her brain power.

Chima: Her face is so shiny. Reminds me of when Marcellas (Season 3) bitched about how shiny his face always looked on camera. He always looked cute though. This one? Ew. Chima reacts the same way I reacted when I got my key though…laughed my ass off. Her forehead looks like Chenbot’s stomach. Black + Talking = Not ghetto but ignorant (I know, I know, that’s not what she meant). Random fact: I once ate at a Brazilian Restaurant called Chima in Atlanta…it was a churrascaria…damnit, now I want some meat.

Jordan: Um, sweetie…what rock have you been living under? Don’t get me wrong. Southern charm is great, but there have been so may advances in our world, there ARE better things out there. Booger = Sex ( As in, she’s had sex in her nose?! Honey, you are more woman than I am. Carry on. Let me know how that works out).

Braden: I hope you have a lot of sex with the ocean. Better you cum in there than anywhere near me. Lucky briefs? Were you wearing them when you got your hair frosted? Who let Dr. 90210 Robert Rey on the show?! And did he really WINK at Lydia? I hope she piledrives his ass at some point.

Laura: Why must you be so easy to hate?! Butterface anyone? You can spread it on anything. Oh, and please get the girl some conditioner, her hair is a fire hazard.

Lydia: Is not into white guys that try to rap. IS into white girls who have inflated egos for no good reason.

Kevin: Blackanese? Blasian? Why can't his Japanese heritage come first?! Why not Japablack? or Asiack?! Just kidding, who cares. I fell in love with him when he threw up in his mouth (you will never hear me say this ever again) AND when he called Natalie out on lying about her age, hahaha. However, he should be careful, he's got a whole lot of fierce...

Casey: Aw, it IS sad that he won’t be there for his son’s birthday. That sucks. I wasn’t sure about him until he made fun of Chima laughing at her own jokes.

You could tell he was a little nervous…knee bobbing up and down and fidgeting with his fingers…bad poker player. My “tell” was when I twirled my hair with my fingers. So…Casey apparently has the biggest balls of all the guys in the house, he was tugging and pulling on his wedgie so much it made ME uncomfortable, and I never get uncomfortable with ball play.

I’m not going to lie, I felt a little déjà vu when the HGs waited in front of the house. Reminded me of when I was standing there…wondering why the F--K there were only 8 of us…not knowing MY EX would be joining me.

Former HGs:

Brian: Still so cute…looks like he lost some weight though. I don’t like ‘em too skinny.
Cowboy: So marriage DOES add 15lbs!
Jessica: Um…yeah. Jessica. That’s all I’ve got.
Jessie: Bigger and better than last year. Did someone tell him it “pounds” (lbs)?! He was the most entertaining though of the four past HG…

BEST QUOTE OF THE COMPETITION goes to…Laura: “My crotch hurts so bad” Yeah, it’s not the first or last time honey.

I know most of us know already who gets nominated, but I will be tuning in to see what goes down…you have no idea the tension in the house come nominations!!! Talk to you all soon…

BUT FIRST, Some questions I need answered:
1. Did the super-wedgies look really erotic in nature or was it just me? I could have watched Laura and Jordan get super wedgies all night…
2. Anyone know why there’s no “11” in the Big Brother logo this year? Am I missing something?



Blogger Paul708 said...

Um, I didn't see season 4, but sorry - not liking this Jun at all.

July 10, 2009 at 6:21 PM  
Blogger Cliff O'Neill said...

Love Jun then. Love her now.

And I got the pleasure of hanging out with Survivor's Eliza two weeks ago. She's SOOOO nice!!! And SOOO pretty! Breathtaking, actually.


Can you tell I've had my Friday afternoon martooni already?

July 10, 2009 at 6:24 PM  
Blogger Lauren said...

finally sitting down and catching up on the days activities. ty Jun great to have your pov, ty Carolyn as always

July 10, 2009 at 6:27 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

anon - i'm checking on that now... thank you for the heads up.

July 10, 2009 at 6:36 PM  
Blogger Jun BB4 said...

Care to elaborate Paul?

July 10, 2009 at 6:40 PM  
Blogger Ry said...

Jun is dishing here with BBDish!? YAY! She was my absolute favorite HG of the season, so it's awesome to see here blogging w/ us here! (I guess I should talk like ure here since ure obviously commenting as well, lol.)

Well, anyways, welcome to the Dish Jun!

~ Ryan ~

July 10, 2009 at 6:47 PM  
Blogger Paul708 said...

Jun, nope. I'm good, thanks.

July 10, 2009 at 6:49 PM  
Blogger Melissa said...

It's great to hear a former HG reaction to the show. Thanks for blogging with us here Jun! :)

July 10, 2009 at 7:04 PM  
Blogger Bonniegirl said...

Welcome Jun! Great to have a former HG to give us her opinion. I didn't start watching BB until season 8 (yeah, I know, right?? lol) but from your writing, I think I would have loved you as well.
Lookin forward to a great season! :-)

July 10, 2009 at 7:32 PM  
Blogger RedRhonda said...

Welcome Jun!! Love the thoughts on all the players and the insight of being on the inside. Great to have you here, thanks!

July 10, 2009 at 7:33 PM  
Anonymous Kvothe said...

Jun will be... an interesting Blogger, to say the least. Can't wait to read more from her.

July 10, 2009 at 7:34 PM  
Blogger Branch said...

welcome welcome welcome jun! you were my favorite on your season!

Its like i'm blogging with a celebrity lol

July 10, 2009 at 7:34 PM  
Blogger Jay said...

Welcome to The Dish Jun

July 10, 2009 at 7:35 PM  
Blogger ResaRae said...

lmao @ laura's butterface! my official nickname for her is teeth. :) sorry it's either that or the other large things screaming at me for their attention.

July 10, 2009 at 7:38 PM  
Blogger reet424 said...

Jun is entertaining .. I like it .. Thanks Jun

July 10, 2009 at 7:39 PM  
Blogger Bethra said...

I'm pretty sure April was on BB10 not BB9.

Bonnie, I started watching BB during season 8 as well. I still feel like a newbie.

July 10, 2009 at 7:40 PM  
Blogger David B said...

Jun nice to see you here. BB4 was my first BB season. um I was actually cheering for Allison, but hey thats in the past :)

July 10, 2009 at 7:42 PM  
Blogger piper said...

Welcome Jun!! I remember you well. I've forgotten the blonde chick you were in the final 2 with....you know the biT$H. What's her name? I couldn't stand her and I was so happy when you won.

July 10, 2009 at 7:42 PM  
Blogger Marci said...

Hi Jun! Welcome to the Dish. I was rooting for you all the way and so glad you won. Thrilled to have you here!

Kudos Carolyn!

July 10, 2009 at 7:42 PM  
Anonymous Alisa said...

Welcome Jun! Great to get insight from not only a former HG but one of the most deserving winners. Thanks for sharing your thoughts this season.

July 10, 2009 at 7:57 PM  
Blogger Jun BB4 said...

Yes, you're right Bethra. I got confused because she had SUCH a lusty showmance, I always associate it with the love theme, haha. Will edit!

Thanks to EVERYONE for the warm welcome.

Resa, totally with you on the Teeth (If I were a guy I'd be scared to put anything in her mouth).

David, I forgive you. I hope you've let go of your love for dairy queen pageant girls with nose jobs. I kid I kid, not :)

July 10, 2009 at 8:02 PM  
Blogger kevin said...

welcome Jun. insightfulness abounds here on this blog. & the comment moderation keeps it relatively cordial. I hope you'll enjoy us as much as we'll certainly ejoy your presence.

How do you feel about the soon to be divulged "composting" that the HGs may be expected to do? I think it would be good to teach America (esp the tvonlys) how to green their lives at least a little. But not holding my breath that the HGs will adhere.

July 10, 2009 at 8:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I completely agree about Michelle! She looks like she could get overly emotional...

July 10, 2009 at 8:08 PM  
Blogger ~♥ஐ♥~ Patty ~♥ஐ♥~ said...

Jun Welcome to ONE of the Best blogs on the net
Loved you on your season so glad to see you win and take Allison down !!!Loved your comments on the HG's can't wait to see your next one.

Well done Carolyn you are simply the BEST!!!!

July 10, 2009 at 8:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, I forgot to say....Welcome!

July 10, 2009 at 8:09 PM  
Blogger ResaRae said...

I actually have an overwhelming urge to call her tits mcgee, but i figure carolyn may not appreciate that too much, so my nicer name is Teeth. :) Great blog by the way Jun. I was cracking up.

July 10, 2009 at 8:15 PM  
Anonymous _Claire_ said...

Hiya Jun...we had a little FB convo one night but its sure nice to see ya got this gig and not Erika!!! and glad you rolled over Allison on S4....I've watched all 10 so far but 11 has me hittin' the off button a LOT. Good Luck with the blog hun

July 10, 2009 at 8:17 PM  
Anonymous SonyaS said...

Hey Jun!! SOOO glad you are here this season for your comments..you kept me laughing then and have me laughing my self into a frenzy with all your "takes" on the Houseguests. Didn't get to see the rest of BB4 because I had an operation, but I am sooo very glad you won!!! I was so out of it for months..but anyway welcome and thanks for the laughter once again!

July 10, 2009 at 8:18 PM  
Blogger Ry said...

ResaRae ~ I beg of you, PLEASE call her Tits McGee! I will if you will, pinky swear!

Jun, my favorite thing about ure post was the comment about Michelle "Aw...she's so screwed". That made me chuckle, heheh.

Laura's teeth would definitely be a guillotine for smaller heads. Now where in the world could we find small heads to fit into a mouth sized guillotine.....?

Carolyn, I swear I'll be cleaner in the other posts!

~ Ryan ~

July 10, 2009 at 8:20 PM  
Blogger katieblue said...

Good Evening Jun,
Looking forward to your thoughts/comments on this season.
Will be nice to get a winners opinion on the happenings inside the house.

July 10, 2009 at 8:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Welcome Jun :)

Your blog made me laugh..

I look forward to more postings


July 10, 2009 at 8:55 PM  
Anonymous Michigan Man said...

Welcome Jun. Catching up on the day since I was at work. It's going to fun to see your take on the season.

I always think I want to be on the show then read former HGs memories and think, maybe not.

I salute anyone who made it through that house.

July 10, 2009 at 10:40 PM  
Anonymous C=Venus said...

So glad to see Jun here. Loved her on the show and love, love, love her writing style. I really missed reading her thoughts when the CBS site stopped doing it coupla years ago. Haven't done any chops yet - I was waiting to get a feel for these peeps - think I'm getting some ideas now tho, LOL! Big shout out to everyone!!! And (((hugz))) to the awesome Mizz Carolyn!!!!

July 11, 2009 at 2:45 AM  
Blogger Jun BB4 said...

Thanks guys! Psyched that we'll all get along :)

Carolyn? Um, she rocks.

July 11, 2009 at 10:54 PM  

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