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Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Oh Children, Behave!

Here we go, Dishers!! Big Brother 4 Winner Jun Song's Exclusive BBDish Blog on the Tuesday CBS broadcast of Big Brother 11. Enjoy! And when you're commenting, please feel free to speak directly to Jun and not about her... This is her post, after all. I'm just sticking my nose in to do the little intro.

I am going to preface this by telling you all that I am super hormonal and after actually crying, yes well tearing up a lot, watching The Bachelorette last night (missed it on Monday because I was ringer at my brother’s bowling league, yeah such versatility in my life HA) I might have a few more choice words for some of our HGs.

I thought it might be harder to watch BB knowing everything going on before they happen but I’ve realized that it doesn’t really matter.

Interesting isn’t it? Thoughts?

Because I have been sharing, I’ll let you know that I did order in dinner again…and it will probably be that last time. Fool me once, shame on you…fool me twice shame on me. The POV competition turned my stomach last night I couldn’t even finish eating!

JEFF: It’s NEVER good not to know what’s going on. And it sucks that in this house who you hang out with is more important than you who you don’t hang out with. Wait. It’s one or the other isn’t it? HAHA. You get my drift. But honestly, why would Jeff pigeon-hole himself to just the athletes? We all know though that Russell is not a fan of this.

Man, this game was made for Russell, he’s just taking the theme CBS handed him and running with it…with a handoff of the baton to Jessie here and there. Are Russell and Jessie bullies? Yes. Does it make me want to run to Jeff’s rescue and um, give him a hand(job)? Yes. I’m not condoning the things Jeff has said / done…I’m not saying I want him to be my baby daddy…a handjob does not a love connection make.

But we thought this blowup was bad? I can’t wait to see Jessie and Russell come time to ditch each other! I’ve never seen two love muscles go at it. Wait, yes I have. I’m starting to sweat in anticipation!

RUSSELL: Doesn’t think this is band camp? Um, I beg to differ. There’s gonna be a lot of skin flute being played this summer…and if Jessie keeps this up, a lot of fingering too…you know, sheet music and stuff. Russell tells us in the diary room that Braden is personable and has a charming smile, etc., and I’m thinking who died and made Russsell , Andy Rooney?

Wait, Andy Rooney is still alive right? I just watched an amazing story (not) on fruit last Sunday (only because it ate into BB for like 12 minutes!) Good ole Rooney made a b*tch want to name 27 fruits off the top of her head after watching that eh? HA!

And I’d like to take this time out to say : I am loving the stubble Russell is rocking?! I’m not a huge fan of stubble burn, but his looks like it’s been grown out enough that it wouldn’t hurt that much. I’m Asian. Me so sensitive you knoh? He is being SUCH a bully though. I don’t like how he started that whole blow-up with Jeff, at least on television (don’t jump on me, but if that’s how the whole thing started and it does seem to be, then I am more on Jeff’s side as far as the cause for all the mayhem).Stolen from http://bb11dish.com

LYDIA: After being nominated, oh the tears. It hurts doesn’t it? But then ohhhh, she confronts Natalie after being duped by Russell…I don’t get why Jessie and Natalie didn’t figure out that Russell threw them under the bus? Good lord though, Lydia she gets away with murder (meaning her makeup and wardrobe, etc.) because I actually LIKED her eye schmear at the POV Ceremony! I won’t be trying that though…I’ll just end up looking like I got my head rammed into my pillow during some morning sex. Sigh…they must be saving Lydia and Jessies tent-pitching for the live show.Stolen from http://bb11dish.com

CHIMA: “That’s all I can do” she says after nominations. Um, hello?! You shouldn’t have volunteered yourself! Not that the “pawn” scheme was entirely in her power, but still, if someone says “I’m gonna put you up on the block, but just for show” I’d be like “Thank you but no thank you.”. I do like the hats she was sporting last nigiht though. Well, not both (that cowboy hat was questionable)…maybe not either, but it’s what the hats actually DID for her…forehead. And then, her “OMG, is that my high school picture?!” referring the huge zit-face during POV made me wonder if her forehead had been a normal size back then? I’m sorry. I’m just never going to let the forehead thing go…unless something else even bigger (no pun intended) comes up. Stolen from http://bb11dish.com

RONNIE: The storage room scene with him and Chima cracked me up. Persuasive speaking, Ronnie? Really? Good luck with that. Haha! He thinks Russell is a loose cannon (which means the other HGs KNEW the way Russell came at Jeff was wrong, but they were all too chicken sh*t / in shock to do anything at the time).
Stolen from http://bb11dish.com
Ronnie, Ronnie, Ronnie…playing a daaaangerous game. You need to keep information to yourself for the most part in the BB house, and think very carefully about what you do share. I remember the night before Nathan was supposed to be booted in my season…I chose that evening to cement his departure by giving him come choice info about Ali. Sure, he confronted me…but I kept super cool (to the point where I thought my heart would beat straight out of my chest) and in the end of it all turned it around so the beef was between Nathan and Justin (and his stooges).

Ronnie might think he’s got some skills in persuasion, but he certainly has NO poker face. When Russell confronted him in the storage room, Ronnie’s adam’s apple was bobbing up and down so fast it reminded me of the time I let my junior high school crush John D’Agostino feel up my boobs for the first time.
Stolen from http://bb11dish.com
Ronnie was he was so scared of Russell! And then watching him follow Russell and Jessie around like a lost tourist in Times Square?! He looked like a dead man walking.Stolen from http://bb11dish.com

LAURA: Please, STFU. I loved loved loved Casey’s straight-faced diary room tidbit regarding Laura: “You can help it, you chose to get implants”. HAHA. But like Casey said, you got a key biatch. I mean, really? Did the new boobs STILL not instill some confidence in yourself as a person? Oh yeah, I forgot. It’s the boobs. Right. Over it.
Stolen from http://bb11dish.com
I can’t even begin to express my annoyance with that whole speech she gave…boo-f*cking-hoo. Little does she know that she could be in the worst of positions or the best of positions post-nominations. She doesn’t even get it until Russell has to approach her about it.

Hmmmm, I think I’ve figured out who she reminds me of…a cross between - and no offense to the ladies I’m about to name- Unitard Jen (Season 8), Lisa D. (Season 3 Winner) and…and…Octomom (picture included, striking similarities eh?)!!Stolen from http://bb11dish.com

Laura’s a tool for sure…and what was up with her getting all cocky when Russell and Jessie recruited her? Oh, she knows the game very very well? Ah yes, and boobs are the key to the game. Yes. ..that’s why there have only been 3 proud boob-donning winners of BB. Well, 3 and a half…Adam (Season 9) kinda had boobs right?

I laughed so hard listening to Russell: “Laura’s shook…she could be ours.” You know. Before Jessie entered the house I dismissed Russell because he’s just too big for my taste. But post-Jessie’s arrival? Russell looks TOTALLY manageable! “Go scoop Laura up now,” Jessie said. I didn’t realize he meant LITERALLY, haha.Stolen from http://bb11dish.com
Stolen from http://bb11dish.com
CASEY: LOVE HIM still. At least for the all the snark that comes from him. He thinks “Braden’s an airheaded pretty face guy thingie.” Maybe what he doesn’t know, is that Braden HAS a weird looking thingie (at least when flaccid)…I know this only because I was forced to check out a picture of it. Okay, I wasn’t forced, but I wasn’t happy about it. I won’t share it here but if you ask nicely and Carolyn allows me, I’ll share the link.

But yeah, ew. It’s like that time I was getting hot and heavy with someone and so excited to GET IT and then when I FELT IT I wondered where the rest of it was. Not happy. He shall remain anonymous…but my girlfriends and I do refer to him as “C****** Little Dick.” I digress. I’ve taken up the majority of this with sh*t having nothing to do with Casey. But don’t forget I’m hormonal!Stolen from http://bb11dish.com

BRADEN: Everyone’s got an opinion on this kid. Ronnie thinks he’s from Planet Klaktu? Is that what he said? Damn him for making me waste time on Google to try to figure that on out. I’m at a loss. But I kinda have to admit, Braden’s not as bad as I thought he’d be, come week 2. The “Give Lydia a kiss” was so cute! He cracked me up with his narration during the POV Ceremony, he was definitely FREAKING OUT when he got put up in place of Lydia, despite his monotone monologue. Sorry for the double “monos” to all the editors out there, but I couldn’t think of anyone else.

Speaking of monotone…remember Kevin Costner’s narration during Dances With Wolves back in the day? I wanted to slit my wrists (not really, I love myself too much…and before I get sh*t for that comment, yes I have had people close to me try to take their own lives so simma’ down out there) listening to his dull voice, but I got used to it by the end. Poor Braden, I think he threw on his shades so we wouldn’t see the tears welling up.

And now…onto..the POV Competition:

When Jessie chose Casey to DJ, I mean, host the competition, all I had in my head was ♫ “Hey Mr. DJ, put a record on, I wanna dance with my baby…” ♫

Um, someone send Lydia the memo that it’s never “her and me” or “him and me” against each other in POV. It’s whatever the majority wants…so it’s really “them and me.”

I’m wondering why didn’t CBS get “Proactiv” in on this competition? Oh right. Maybe because they make enough money anyway all summer (and only give away $500K to the winner?!)?
That’s it. Seriously. I’m never ordering take-out in anticipation of my guilty pleasure (BB if you don’t get it) ever again.

This was so gross. Pop Goes the Veto?!?! Ewwww! And did Chima really say “..having the expansive forehead that I do?” Wait, no. I just watched it again. She said expansive vocaaaabulary. Phew. I thought I was going to have to give her props for recognizing what she sees in the mirror. Never mind. I can continue to harp.

Grossest POV ever: $26 (My not finishing my dinner)

Kevin ‘s repeated “Oh my god” when pimples started erupting: PRICELESS

I’m not going to spend much time here since we all know the POV Ceremony was way more important than what happened during the competition. Although I was waiting to see what Jessie actually ended up spelling out, and I was not disappointed…Jessie provides so many opportunities to laugh at / with/ around him CONTINOUSLY. HAHA
Stolen from http://bb11dish.com
I do wonder if Natalie threw the competition with “LAST,” but I can’t blame her. Aside from that, her argument with Jeff following Russell’s meltdown was the only other action we saw from her really. There is NOTHING GOOD that comes from blowups on this show.

So what if Jeff can’t spell. He warned us. And Russell says Jeff is as useful as a bag of marbles. But for the record, I use marbles to sink fresh flowers into when I put them in a vase, so I don’t know what Russell’s talking about. They come in pretty handy in my opinion. If you don’t believe me, watch My Fair Lady…they’re great for sticking them in your mouth to practice enunciating more clearly. HA.

QUOTE OF THE SHOW goes to Lydia “I had spew on my face” And she wasn’t talking about Jessie’s you dirty minded bloggers. HA.

And did Laura really run right up to the HOH room after the competition? Idiot.Stolen from http://bb11dish.com

I wish we had had more Kevin and Michele on the show last night…but I’m satisfied with Jordan’s 2 minutes of airtime…

Sigh…I’m gonna go relax in a bubble bath and hope my mood swing passes…speaking of which, and this is for the ladies: Isn’t it annoying when you’re in the hot bubble bath but the tops of your boobs remain cold? I need a solution…without drowning myself…




Blogger WendyLady33 said...

Holy Smokes thats one big prego lady!

July 15, 2009 at 3:33 PM  
Blogger WendyLady33 said...

Chicken Little D huh? I use to call my ex husbands a Canary.

July 15, 2009 at 3:40 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

hehehe - octomama...

July 15, 2009 at 3:40 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...


Goin' for a bike ride! Must get off my rapidly expanding tush.

I'll be back by 5pm BBT to start the evening posting & publishing all your comments.

And... ReporterX is in the wings, listening intently.

In the event any of the HGs spontaneously combusts (again), RepX will be adding it to the Afternoon post, already in progress.

See ya soon! :)

July 15, 2009 at 3:43 PM  
Blogger WendyLady33 said...

Jun - I got a few suggestions for cold boobs in the bath.

1. Soaker tub! BF just put one in for me and i love it - no more frozen nipples!

2. Before the soaker tub i used a face cloth to keep the puppies warm.

July 15, 2009 at 3:45 PM  
Anonymous RhondaM said...

The POV definitely grossed me out too. I had to throw out the pizza rolls I was munchin on.

I like your opinions Jun. It's fun seeing you on here! Oh, and you can put a washcloth over the boobies to keep them warm. My hubby hates it when i do though. He likes seeing them. hehe.

July 15, 2009 at 3:46 PM  
Anonymous Alisa said...

Jun-another great blog! Thanks again for sharing your thoughts and keeping us laughing this summer.

July 15, 2009 at 3:46 PM  
Anonymous RhondaM said...

I'm with ya Carolyn. Going for a ride too.

July 15, 2009 at 3:47 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

ok - this time i mean it :) be back soon! :)

July 15, 2009 at 3:49 PM  
Anonymous Pat in NJ said...


Kevin isn't the only who is priceless. That was a great out take.Keep them coming. When I think of a solution for your tub issue I will post it.

July 15, 2009 at 3:50 PM  
Anonymous KellieJ said...

Jun - you are so freakn' funny. I loved you during BB4 and I love ya still. This is the last time I will read your blog at work because WOW I was chuckling my arse off.

July 15, 2009 at 3:50 PM  
Blogger WendyLady33 said...

*waving frantically* HI X!!

July 15, 2009 at 3:55 PM  
Blogger Jun BB4 said...

Exactly Rhonda, I like looking at mine! Hahaha

Wendy, close...hahaha but not chicken :) I need to get my a*s a soaker tub.

Damnit, now I want pizza rolls...

July 15, 2009 at 3:56 PM  
Blogger mikeinbama said...

I just finished my 2-a-day workout and boy am I in need of a massage.

I've watched the feeds today and no one has said anything interesting.

Hello Everyone.... Carolyn, ReporterX, Genie sea, Blue, Ry, Gaytor, umbeta

I think Chima's "LaToya Jackson Weave" is going to win the next HOH and rule the house.

Don't get in the way of "The Weave" because it's kicking a$$ and taking names. It's going to rule the house with an iron fist, like communist china.

"The Weave" didn't come into the house to make friends.

It's so funny that Ronnie thinks he's a power broker in this game. He just can't help himself.

July 15, 2009 at 4:00 PM  
Blogger Genie Sea said...

Jun - That was hilarious! For the tops of your boobs. A washcloth! Dip it in the hot water and let it rest. But if Laura were to do that, she would drown for sure :)

July 15, 2009 at 4:00 PM  
Blogger Nicole B. in OKC said...

I don't get the octomom picture...

July 15, 2009 at 4:00 PM  
Blogger bluex1969 said...

Jun wrote: "because I actually LIKED her eye schmear at the POV Ceremony! I won’t be trying that though…I’ll just end up looking like I got my head rammed into my pillow during some morning sex."


OMG!!!!! Girl, you are a hoot and a half!!!!! You can bake my clams anytime, Hon!!!! (No, I don't know what that means, A sailor said it to me years ago.....still scratching my head on it!!!! )

Awesome post!!!! Loved reading it!!!

You are soooo insightful!!!

Love ya!!!


July 15, 2009 at 4:03 PM  
Blogger David said...

I refuse to call her octomom. She's only to be called "The Clown Car" around me! you know at the circus how those clowns keep spilling out of that tiny car...?

Now, as for BB... I'm saddened by Ronnie - he gives gamers a bad name - we're not all obsessed with chapstick - we're not all lurkers with sickly greazy hair - some of us are nice!

July 15, 2009 at 4:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jun, Jun, Jun. The artist formerly known as voy_your on James' forum here (the lez). Why do I feel the need to I.D. myself? It's about bonding. I'll sign my name at the bottom for future bonding.

I had to pee b4 I read this, I successfully did while I read it....before I go change into drys...seriously, if you ain't gotta agent girl, work on that. Then,tell me where the 1st appearance will be on your stand up. Cho is in so much trouble.

Carolyn, Dish rocked b4 but having Jun here took it to (MAD TV ya'll)whole nubba lebel.

I am standing at applause wet drawers and all. Jun, u sooooo funny, you knoh?

Shelly (let's put my name on this)

p.s. the adam's apple comment about Ronnie made me LOL...literally. *sigh*

July 15, 2009 at 4:07 PM  
Blogger JudyP said...

Hehe, Jun you crack me up. Thanks for posting.

July 15, 2009 at 4:14 PM  
Anonymous Michigan Man said...

Great job again Jun. When I started reading I'm thinking, I know that woman who is that and what does she have to do with BB? Octomom LOL classic.

Also if it hasn't been said today.


Anyone else notice how many letters Russel actually had before he spelled shotgun?

July 15, 2009 at 4:17 PM  
Blogger Cris said...

Great article, Jun. Love your snarky take on the game.

No matter what happens Thursday there's probably gonna be some drama in the BB house after the vote count gets read. Both sides seem fairly confident they have the votes of Ronnie/Michele/Laura/Casey/Kevin. I've got a feeling Jeff's gonna be one cranky puppy Thursday night.

July 15, 2009 at 4:23 PM  
Blogger umbeta1455 said...

HAHAHA JUN, you made playing the skin flute and fingering sound so innocent and dirty at the same time. You had me sold after I read that. Love the innocent dirty talk even if what I say usually just sounds dirty. lol.

July 15, 2009 at 4:48 PM  
Blogger bluex1969 said...

EEk!!!!! Jordan is wearing a green face cream mask!!!!! LOL (and yet, she still looks cute....strange....LOL)

July 15, 2009 at 4:56 PM  
Anonymous Dylan said...

You know that beanie that braden is always wearing?? I found it on line, 1000 dollers!! http://www.farfetch.com/shopping/men/mastermind-japan/item10007198.aspx

July 15, 2009 at 4:57 PM  
Anonymous Kvothe said...

You should be a comedian, Jun.

July 15, 2009 at 5:01 PM  
Anonymous Maria Hernandez said...

Jun- "Run and give Jeff a handy-J" you kill me! Love your run-downs, keep 'em comin'! And I agree, Casey and Kevin are definitly my favs.

July 15, 2009 at 5:04 PM  
Blogger bluex1969 said...

Uh oh, one of my posts didn't go through!!!! *blue hides in deep shame* LOL

July 15, 2009 at 5:09 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

blue - i haven't rejected any... maybe you commented on a different post?

July 15, 2009 at 5:11 PM  
Blogger Melanie said...

LOL Love you post!
As for your cold breast in the bath problem... I hardly have any yet I know what you're talking about!! LOL get a wash cloth and wet it and put it on top of there! Or what I did was have hubby buy me a new house with a HUGE tub in it for me!! LOL

July 15, 2009 at 5:11 PM  
Blogger Cindy said...

Hey Jun,
Hilarious bloggin' Have you tried a snorkel? Just an idea so you don't drown. Lol

July 15, 2009 at 5:12 PM  
Blogger Cris said...

Tell me I did not just hear Jordan tell Ronnie that no one knows how tight she and Jeff are!? It must be nice to live in Jordan's world...a land of fantasy and delusion ...and of course time has no meaning.

July 15, 2009 at 5:12 PM  
Blogger bluex1969 said...

Oh no, it showed a conflict or something, I forget how it was worded......Figured it didn't go through!!!! hehehe

It was just about giving advice to Jun and chilly boobies in the bath.....suggesting hiring hot bois in fig leaves to gently press them with hot cloths while feeding her chocolate covered strawberries, grapes, assorted gourmet cheeses, and sips of wine....

LOL, just being my usual silly/stupid self....lol

Error on my end, not yours!!!!

July 15, 2009 at 5:13 PM  
Blogger Lauren said...

well i was gonna comment on the tub thing, but i think blue's idea would work best. fyi they make "normal" tubs now but they are deep. i want me one of them. Jun... u rock!

July 15, 2009 at 5:21 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

I'm voting for Blue's idea. I'll take 3, please.

And I'll be opening a new post shortly...

July 15, 2009 at 5:26 PM  
Blogger bluex1969 said...

I know what u mean about "normal" tubs, Lauren....I have corner Jacuzzi tub....deep, with jet and massage action....heated/so the bath water doesn't go cold...seats 4(not that I've tried it out or anything, hehehehe)......it's a little slice of heaven....

....in fact....why am I not in it now?.....hmmmm....

July 15, 2009 at 5:33 PM  
Blogger Cris said...

Woah We have trivia at 7:40. Wasn't expecting that.

July 15, 2009 at 5:42 PM  
Blogger bluex1969 said...

UMMMM....anyone know why we have Trivia on the Live Feeds now? That's usually reserved for Eviction day........

I'm sooooo confused......

July 15, 2009 at 5:42 PM  
Blogger Paul708 said...

Brilliant! Brava! And I pretty much agree with you across the board. xxoo

July 15, 2009 at 5:42 PM  
Anonymous Pat in NJ said...

I just clicked on the get tickets to attend a taping that you have on the sidebar and I went to Craig Ferguson and the HG are supposedly on tonight.

Perhaps they are taping now.

July 15, 2009 at 5:47 PM  
Anonymous RhondaM said...

I'm coming over Blue! All i have is a small shower/tub that barely fits my 6 year old. When i lived in Vegas, I had a huge tub and I miss it. Boohoo...

July 15, 2009 at 6:03 PM  
Blogger Paul708 said...

PS I keep looking (and looking) at Braden's willy and I don't see anything wrong with it. Maybe I need to peek again ;-)

July 15, 2009 at 6:51 PM  
Blogger Bethra said...

Jun, you slay me! I so wish I saw your season because you and I have that same sarcastic sense of humor that special people appreciate, lol.

July 15, 2009 at 6:53 PM  
Blogger GaYToR said...

JUN!!! You outdid yourself once again. I can't imagine what it will be like when you can focus on half the size the house is right now. You manage to get a dig in on everyone with all 13. I shiver in antici..........pation!

And Jun, I get away with so so so much. In all my time here Ive only got the trash can once, and was expecting it as I was typing. Actually Carolyn is very lenient with us all. Just follow the rules... almost everything else goes. When I pout it's always with a tongue sticking out and a huge giggle.

Oh, and your sharing of the issues with your father... very touching. It shows even you have a real life with real crises.

Re: Octomom pic. I was scrolling backwards when I first saw that and wondered how the hell did anyone get a pic of DQTD's (my partner of 28+ years) belly. but then I realized those weren't his lips and he doesn't have that much hair.

Now on to the current post. I wanted this one to go in the right place.

Keep up the fab work. We look forward to it and to your comments with us through the rest of the week.

Seriously, come to New Orleans and see me in a really bad drag show.


July 15, 2009 at 7:30 PM  
Blogger Jun BB4 said...

Oh Carolyn, I wouldn't want anyone else providing me an "intro".You write like you speak and I dig that. You get everyone excited aobut everything. Heck, I got excited to read my blog reading your intro. HAHA.

Thanks you guys for enjoying, everyone seriously. I feel like Sally Field...you get me, you really really get me. I did have moment of "The HGs will be out some September and then they might read some of these blog. And then I might have some upset people."

But I can take it, I've taken it before. That's why I dish it.

Blue, I think I will try to use "bake my clams" at some point this season if you will give me copyright. Ah. I have posted in "etc jobs" on Craigslist for those bath boys.

Voy_your the lez, hello! How are you Shelly?

Paul, you don't think it's weird looking? I don't know. It just looks so...unhealthy, like uncomfortable, when i get the right word I'll share.

OMG Cindy, the snorkel comment was amazing. You know I have snorkel, I know you know.HA.

Bethra "You slay me"?! I never say that because I don't think I can pull it off. There, I said it. But I have a super yummy guy friend who uses that on me and it gives me the goose bumps. I heart you.

Anticipation, anticipa-yay-tion it's driving me wild, Gaytor. I've been to New Orleans once, I would love to come see you girl! Your comment re your ex's belly had me laughing.

I just finished cooking up a 5course dinner (6th course was pastries from Veniero's that my friends brought over). I am exhausted. And enjoying my summer immensely.

What fun here. Good night all!

July 15, 2009 at 11:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jun, aren't you going to post the link to Braden's nudie pic?!

July 16, 2009 at 8:41 AM  
Blogger Jun BB4 said...

Am I allowed?! I don't think I am! It's "nudity" :)

July 17, 2009 at 12:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh em geez, Jun said Hi to me. BB Star struck. LOL

FYI, I'm good, thank for you asking. Even more, thank you for blogging.

Should I say on every post I make you need to do stand up, or just encourge you along the way? Either way, let me know where I get da tix.

Shelly the lez

July 17, 2009 at 3:34 PM  

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