Monday Night Smackdown
7:00 PM BBT
- Jordan & Michelle are running laps.
- Jessie & Russell are doing lunges..
- Natalie & Ronnie are having an exerting game of pool.
Most of the rest are napping inside or scheming or both.
7:19 PM BBT
Kevin has joined the land of the living. Jordan is sitting with him on the patio.
***Control Room overkill today!
Jordan & Jeff
Jordan & Jeff
Jordan: I am your only BFF.
Jeff: In here yeah. You got me.
Jordan: Were you crying?
Jordan: You might have pink eye.
Jeff: I have to check my contracts. They get dirty.
Jordan: They get dirty?
Jeff: Were you listening? Or did you ask a question to talk?
Random cute chatter.
Jordan: Did you have braces?
Jeff: You ask me the same questions everyday. It's like I'm stuck in Groundhog Day.
Some bantering around.
Jeff: So are you going to hook me up with your friends when I come there?
Jeff: You're such a dork. Talking like that in front of everyone.
Jordan: You said you like brown-haired girls!
Jeff: You're such a dork!
(***He likes you goofball!)
Very cute exchange on feed3!
7:46 PM BBT
Michele & Jessie
Michele is confronting Jessie about going to Russell about her trying to rally votes for Ronnie.
Michelle: That conversation never happened
Jessie: Whisper whisper Ronnie... We'll talk later.
Michele: I'd rather confront you than be like a$$h*le.
***Jessie backpedals faster than a chipmunk on speed.
Kevin & Natalie
Groundhog Day Discussion #9839
Who has The Coup D'Etat?
DO they have the Coup D'Etat?
Goes to random chitchat.
DR Leak over the speakers!!! (Jeff in DR)
Kevin & Natalie get excited.
Control Room BRB for a few hot seconds.
Kevin: Maybe that was...?
Natalie: They were just asking questions.
Kevin: Dude the f*cked up. That was hilarious.
Natalie: How's Lydia feeling?
Kevin: She's sleeping.
Natalie: I'm feeling great. Just wondering about what happened earlier.
Kevin: They found out that he was lying.
They go over the discussion about Russell pitting Lydia and Chima. That they hate each other.
Natalie: And me!
Kevin: You hate her too.
Natalie: I don't hate the girl. (...)
BB voice: Natalie. Please go to the Diary Room.
Natalie: You're gonna hear me now.
8:04 Pm BBT
Michele, Jeff, Russell, Jordan & Jessie
Michele is speculating about who the Wizard might be.
Jeff: You think too much. I'm not in the mood to think right now.
Jordan: He's in a bad mood today.
Jeff: I'm not the Wizard is all I'm saying.
Silence. Food prep. Eating. Cleaning.
Michele: two more days and you're done. (Have not)
Jessie: Yup. I'm excited. (**as someone contemplating lint)
Jeff goes outside and the feeds follow him. (***future Wizard)
**It's hard to have a coherent update between the jumping feeds and the cuts to control room.
Kevin & Jeff
More wizardry discussion... (**Kevin. Don't obstruct your microphone)
**HA! I beat you BB!
Michele joins them. Chitchat on working out.
Russell comes out. Pickle talk.
(**I might need tequila for this...)
Jeff is on a roll!!!
Jeff: I'm closed for the day. If anyone comes to me and start talking sh*t, I will stab them in the eye with that fork. I will be out of the bitter barn tomorrow! You think I can't see you through that mirror? I'm not playing today! Stop looking at me!
8:20 PM BBT
Jessie & Natalie. Lydia lying behind the sofa.
Turbo whispering. Can't make it out.
Seems like the threesome have made up.
Jessie & Natalie move to the Have Room with Ronnie and Chima, and commence more whispering. It sounds like they didn't know Lydia was there before.
Jessie: I'll tell you later.
Natalie: Lets go now.
Jessie: Calm down tiger.
(***Sorry maybe their voices wore out my speakers, or my BSometer is on high tonight. I have no idea what they are saying, except random words.)
They move back to the living room because Lydia left.
Jessie:I told Michele I would do the same for you.
He is telling Natalie about Michele confronting him in the bathroom. Coach Natalie is telling him what to say (lie).
Jessie: No. No. They talk all the time. (In other words, they can't lie.) It was my mistake not you guyses.
Natalie: She did say that. She did say that. She did say that. throw it back in his face. I got your back.
In a nutshell, Jessie is planning on telling Russell that he lied to him, that Jessie approached Michele with the "Save Ronnie" plea. Natalie is trying to stop him.
Jessie: I'm gonna say, Russell you were on my side. I went to bat for you. They talk more than we do. Do you see where I'm coming from?
Chima is encouraging him to lie. (***Didn't Nat and Chima say they hate liars?) Now Chima is getting all worked up and leaves in a huff.
Jessie: Because of me. Do you know what I mean?
Natalie goes to Chima in the Have Room.
Natalie: Do you get what happened?
Chima: Why are we defending people? He should lie.
Natalie: That's what I'm saying.
Chima: What does it matter? It's over.
Natalie is going over the whole thing with Chima while Chima files her nails furiously.
Natalie: All I'm saying is...
Chima: I'm not going to have any conversations with her. I'm not in the mood.
Natalie: We have to fight for our lives next week.
Jessie comes in and says that he will take a bullet for them. They are against that plan.
8:39 PM BBT
Kevin & Lydia
They talk about Russell for a a few hot seconds until Kevin brings the reality check.
Kevin: You're on the block too hon.
Jessie & Natalie
8:46 PM BBT
Lydia & Kevin
They are talking about the HOH competition. They are speculating it will be majority rules. (**BB don't use that one!)
Kevin: Now that Ronnie is gone. Who is his...
Kevin: My gut says you will stay. If there is a grand scheme to backdoor someone, they wouldn't even do it on one of us. We haven't been huge schemers, masterminds (**anything)...
Lydia: Russell has lost so much. He doesn't have you does he?
(**This conversation simply proves that they have no idea what is going on in the house. They have burned bridges on both sides)
8:49 PM BBT
Jordan & Michele
Looking at Spy Cam.
They think Ronnie is coming up and plan on hiding in the bathroom.
Jordan: Russell wants to make sure that no one goes against them. What do you mean Russell. We have the votes.
Michele is worried about Kevin.
Russell & Jessie come in. Russell asks them to leave.
Russell: At what point were you going to let me know that Natalie and Chima were going to backdoor me.
Jessie: The people I'm closest to are Natalie Chima and you. Bro, I'm going to look you in the eye. No. Everybody in the house wanted you out except me and Natalie. And I'm saying week two.
Russell: Chima has a plan with all the girls. Did you know that? The problem is Chima wants me out.
Jessie: She wants Kevin and Lydia.
Russell: Why would she want her friend out. You do know that Chima wants to keep all the girls in.
Jessie: You told me that week one.
Russell: All I know when I talked to her she has never uttered your name.
(**Russell are you buying this shizz?)
Jessie: If I don't win next week. We're f*cked. The only time you know you're safe is when your fate is in your hands. Whats the significance of calling her out? (**Jessie keeps repeating about week 2)
Russell: I trust you and only you. I don't trust Natalie or Chima or anyone else in the house. (**WTF) If it's only me and you in the end. Fine.
Jessie: I guarantee you. I go to the people closest to me.
Russell: Those people are closest to you.
Jessie (denying, denying. denying): If you go, so do I.
Russell: You need to watch what you say to Chima. She doesn't want a guy to win.
Jessie: I'm going to respect what you say. I hope that when I'm HOH you will do the same.
Russell is trying to turn Jessie against Natalie and Chima. That even the DR tried to get him to put Jessie up (**Note no BB warning) Jessie is talking in circles. He says his targets are Kevin and Natalie. He says he doesn't want to put Jordan and Jeff up. He would like to talk to them but can't sit outside too long.
(***He is blowing so much smoke up Russell's butt, I'm surprised it isn't coming out of his ears.)
Now Jessie is using the fact that Chima wants all girls to win to plug for Lydia to be evicted Thursday.
Russell: What about what you told Michele?
Jessie: I asked her give me a name of who you want as a replacement for you. The first time she said Casey. The second time she said Ronnie. Something's not making sense. (***Exactly)
Russell: Michele told me she didn't approach in the Green room?
Jessie: He is saying that he questioned her and she kept saying no.
Jessie spins, denying all knowledge of Chima's shenanigans. Russell takes it all in.
(**Paranoia will be your undoing Russell)
**They have thrown pretty much everyone under the bus except Natalie and Ronnie.
***I'm done transcribing this conversation because a) it's repetitive and b) it makes no sense.
Flashback Feeds 1 & 2
9:55 PM BBT
Natalie & Jessie
Jessie is filling Natalie quickly in on his conversation with Russell. She tells him they will talk later. But she knows thing have changed because Russell came up and gave her a hug.
10:04 PM BBT
Russell, Jessie, & Natalie
Russell is officially bonding again with them. He wants Natalie to get Chima and go up to HOH. Jessie keeps saying there is no one saying that they will backdoor Russell, and the Michele is lying. Russell goes up to HOH waiting for the others to come up.
(***Oh sweet fingers will go numb - Flex!)
Natalie takes Chima to the bathroom to coach her. Chima is riled up.
Chima: Am I already in a bad room? Does Michele want me to kick her a$$?
Chima goes up to HOH.
Chima: I came up here because Natalie told me that Michele was talking sh*t. How do I know you're not lying.
Russell: I have never lied.
Chima raises her eyebrow.
Russell: Michele told me that you want to backdoor me.
Chima: Bring her in here.
Russell: Hold on, let me finish my story before you grab her.
He rehashes the whole story. Chima insists that she get Michele.
Chima: Go grab her.
SPARK it UP peeps! Smackdown impending!
Chima: So Russell is telling me you told him that I ma going around the house I want to backdoor him.
Michele: I didn't say that.
Russell: Are you kidding me right now?
Michele: Yeah I'm joking Russell
Russell: Did you say that Chima wants to backdoor me?
Chima: All of this that he says that you say I said. I didn't say. If it's speculation, it's okay. The conversation from last night has nothing to do that.
Russell: I'm not talking about last night. Did you say that Jessie and Natalie and Chima sat here and said that they wanted to backdoor me?
This conversation is going in circles. Interesting to note, only Russell is worked up. The ladies are calm. Chima says she was convinced that he was lying when she heard that. (**In other words she doesn't believe Michele said that.)
Russell: She was out there telling me you were after me.
Michele: You were outside being neurotic. You wanted to know who was after you.
The fact is you never tell the truth. I'm not talking to you. All you do is lie.
Chima: You can't attack people and walk away. Russell, what are you trying to do? All you care about yourself. The way you're doing things makes me think you're lying.
Russell (from the HOH landing) Hey Natalie did Michele tell you in the Green room?
Chima:Don't even listen to him. He's lying!
Chima and Russell are screaming at each other.
They go outside. Chima yells at everyone that he is full of sh*t.
(**The only thing he did was solidify Chima and Michele's relationship. Maybe even bring Natalie into the mix.)
Natalie: Things that people are saying Ronnie said. He didn't say.
(**Congratulations Russell, you might have saved Ronnie.)
Chima brings Jordan and Jeff inside to bring them up to speed.
Jordan is telling Chima that Russell told her the reason he and Chima were fighting because Lydia told her that Michele and Jordan were up in HOH. Jordan and Chima are comparing notes. The end result? Russell might as well leave now. His game is done.
Chima is clarifying that Lydia and she were comparing notes with what Russell has said to each of them, but Russell wanted to spin it that Chima was angry because Jordan was in the HOH. Chima is saying that Russell is the instigator of all the lies.
Chima: That's why he needs to go.
Jordan: Jeff and I thought you were mad at us. That's why I was staying away from you cause you were in a bad mood. He is trying to get everyone to go against Michele for some reason.
Jordan says she and Jeff are not gunning for Chima.
Jordan: I heard that Jessie and Natalie are coming after us.
Chima: You know who they want out? I probably should not tell you...Russell.
10:36 PM BBT
Natalie & Michele
Nat comes in and asks her if she's OK.
Michele: No, that was ridiculous. I was worried he was gonna hit one of us.
Natalie: Are you a brain surgeon or neurologist because that's what Russ said. -
Michele: I'm just a research assistant.
Natalie tells Michele that the perception of her is that she can't be trusted because she does not speak to anyone. (**And now I;m sure she wishes she hadn't spoken to Russell) She is also subtly putting in a suggestion to keep Ronnie.
Michele: Yes Russell is doing bad things right now. Russell needs to go right now, but it doesn't impact my decision (to vote Ronnie out).
Natalie keeps plugging to keep Ronnie. She is making Michele think that she is part of 'the group'. She is not being successful
Michele: Yes it would benefit you as a group, but I don't see the value of keeping him in the game.
Conversation over. Natalie joins the rest in the kitchen (Jeff, Ronnie, Lydia, &Kevin). Chima & Jordan are still talking in the Green room. Michele goes to the bathroom sofa. Kevin joins her.
Kevin: Good for you for standing up for yourself.
Michele hears Ronnie talking and says, "STFU Ronnie."
Kevin tries to calm her down.
Natalie has joined Russell outside. Russell is still slamming Michele. Natalie promises that if she wins that she will put Michele up. She is fueling his fire. Russell is calling her dumb and that she fell in the trap. More of the same that was said in HOH.
Jeff comes out: Cool off?
Russell: What's cooking.
Jeff: Something about all the girls in the house are going against all the guys in the house.
Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
Natalie, Kevin, Lydia, Ronnie, Michele, Jordan & Chima
Everything Russell has ever said to anything is being outed. Throughout this whole discussion, Natalie does nto miss an opportunity to canonize Ronnie.
Feed 1 is on Ronnie in the Green room listening in with a huge smirk on his face.
Feed 3& 4
Russell is campaigning to Jeff.
Kevin is challenging Ronnie because Ronnie tried to play the victim on all this.
Ronnie: I will give you an analogy
Kevin: You're a m*therf*cker. You're a liar. You have lied at me so many times! Don't ever raise my voice at me, I will come after you. You might have Natalie and you might have Natalie but yo don't fool me.
Lydia gets in on this. They are calling him out on his alliance with Russell. Ronnie tries to say something about semantics, and sets Kevin off again. They are calling Ronnie out on his Hitler comments.
Chima: Can we all agree that Russell is going up if anyone gets HOH?
Michele: That wasn't the plan before. It is now.
(***Note Jessie is nowhere to be found. He is playing possum somewhere. Correction. He is in the DR. They just called Lydia to the diary room. Now they don't know where Jessie is. Double correction. He is playing possum in the Doom room.)
Jeff: Let's discuss the dishes all over the house. Can we?
11:29 PM BBT
All over the place.
Chima goes outside to challenge Russell, about him saying about her wanting him. She trows water on him and goes inside.
He follows her and the screaming match continues. Russell screams that she wanted to give him a bl*wj*b.
Chima: Go outside and play pool by yourself.
Russell: All your big lips are good for is talking and s*cking d*ck.
Chima: Oh that doesn't make you sound like a misogynist.
Chima goes right up to his face. Throws water in his face, Kevin breaks it up. Natalie stands around but does/says nothing.
**I can't keep up with this.. GET THE FEEDS. Flashback feed 2!
Chima puts her hands on his shoulders. Kevin takes Chima away. She goes back. Jeff comes in between. Kevin and Jeff stand between them. (**still no sign of Jessie)
Jeff takes Russell outside. Jeff is trying his level best to calm him down. Russell asks Jeff if he wants to play pool.
Jeff: I'm having a cigarette. You're all stressing me the f*ck out.
Russell is sounding like a broken record.
BB Voice: Chima please come to the Diary Room.
11: 39 PM
Michele, Jordan, Natalie & Kevin
They are getting into a fight over Ronnie. Natalie is defending him. (He is crying in the Have room to Chima who is out of DR. Russell was called to DR)
Michele gets up and leaves and Natalie goes inside the Have room to tell Chima. Michele goes in there to address what Natalie is saying and Ronnie starts attacking Michele. Kevin comes to her rescue.
Kevin: You're always trying to intimidate Michele.
***People I can't transcribe this fast!
Control BRB on all feeds. (**SWAT team interference no doubt)
Feeds are back after a few minutes. Seems Kevin was called into DR. Apparently they are all being told to stay 3 feet from each other. (**They might need a new house.)
Calm has been restored (for now) in the house.
Chima: Jessie is hiding.
Natalie: He has a stomach ache.
Chima: Yeah right.
(**Jessie & Lydia are in the Have-not room. Jessie is giving his sob story to one of the two people in the house who will buy it.)
Ronnie was called to DR, and when he came out he said, "They said all bets are off."
CUT TO: CONTROL ROOM!
It's calm for now. People are being called to DR one by one. It looks like they might be having a production intervention but I'm not certain.
Jordan: I'm having a deja vu.
Jeff: You are? When the f*ck have you experienced something like this. (***Gotta love Jeff!)
Chima continues to egg Russell on. He is called to DR and as he passes her, she says, "punk."
12:11 AM BBT
All for feeds on Lydia and Jessie, Natalie joins them. Michele bashing. Lydia tries to defend her. Natalie is calling Michele all sorts of names.
Natalie: B*tch I will f*cking kill you. I will shank a b*tch.
Lydia is feeding them what they need to hear. Meanwhile they have been trying to get her evicted.
12:20 AM BBT
Michele & Jordan
They are talking about the votes and Ronnie. Michele is telling Jordan on how Natalie, Jessie and Ronnie were trying to force her into an alliance. (**Sorry turbo whispering. I hear their air conditioner more than what they are saying.) Michele thinks Jeff or Kevin is the wizard. She and Jordan agree that Michele needs to talk to Kevin. Michele tells Jordan that the NBK is targeting Jeff and want him out.
Michele: Jeff's a good guy. I trust him.
Jordan: Chima doesn't know that you are with us.
12:27 AM BBT
Russell & Jeff
Russell is going over the same story updated earlier in this post. Jordan comes out. She asks Russell if it's true that Jessie and Natalie want Jeff and her out. Russell blows her off, saying he doesn't know. Jordan challenges him, forcing him to acknowledge that they were coming after Jeff and Jordan. Russell is working hard to make them not trust Michele. He thinks he "figured it out". (***You haven't bucko.)
Jordan: I believe Michele more, sorry.
She has a theory that the blow up between Chima and Russell is fake. She and Michele saw Russell wink at Chima as he was going to DR the last time.
Natalie comes out and puts the kabosh on the discussion. Jeff asks her if Michele came to them for protection to vote Ronnie out. Natalie says they didn't go for it, because she respects the HOH's wishes. (***Meanwhile she has been trying to keep Ronnie in the house. WHY can't they see that?)
Mercifully, Michele and Kevin come out. Can I get a witness?
Jacuzzi round table discussion. Natalie has stopped spewing lies because she can't spin with so many witnesses. They are keeping to general discussions. The TV edits. The competitions.
BB Voice: Lydia. Please (disengage your head out of Jessie's butt) and go to the diary room.
Natalie is sounding like she knows when the voting has ended. Michele challenges her., "How do you know?" (**She doesn't know.)
General chitchat until everyone except Natalie and Jeff go in. She takes the opportunity to plug Jessie some more, giving empty promises. Saying the same things over and over.
1:16 AM BBT
Ronnie & Chima
Chima is questioning him about his alliance with Russell. Ronnie is spinning more webs. He is changing every single conversation he had with everyone to his favor. He is whining that Kevin "chest butted" him. (**Poor saintly canonized Ronnie) Kevin comes in and Ronnie does the politician apology. Kevin apologizes too.
Chima, Ronnie & Kevin deconstruct Russell's lies starting with what he does for a living, that he claimed to be a Navy Seal, a firefighter, (**a baker and a candlestick maker) Interesting to note that throughout this whole conversation Michele has been getting ready for bed but has not said a word. Michele goes to bed. Kevin leaves. Jeff comes in to take a shower. Talk turns to The Sound of Music.
Meanwhile in Green Room
Jessie & Lydia
Jessie is spinning... (**As is my head)
1:40 AM BBT
Jordan, Kevin, Jeff & Natalie
I guess Jeff decided against the shower. They are talking about Ronnie and his fake crying. Russell and his lies. Natalie. surprisingly, defends Ronnie. Jeff refuses to buy it.
***Genie is getting a headache.
Jordan: Wow. There are some actors in this place.
Kevin: Russell never said it, but I suspect that he was coming after Jessie and you.
Natalie: We didn't feel safe with Russell (*** hello? So you people not hear her contradictions?)
Michele coming out puts an end to Natalie's Ronnie Campaign. Kevin tells them that Russell apologized to Chima.
Natalie: What did she say?
Natalie: Did he apologize to you?
Natalie: There comes a point when...
Silence. Natalie goes inside. Lydia has disengaged herself from Jessie and comes out. Food talk. They want to make hot dogs.
***Clearly, the Russell/Michele alliance of one day is over. The question remains, are Jordan and Jeff still on board with Michele?
Natalie has gone in to report to Jessie what a great job at dissemination she has been doing tonight. (**I'm paraphrasing without actually going to that feed. I need mercy! :)
1:57 AM BBT
Chima: F*ck that shit!
Lydia: Jessie was trying to justify Russell's screaming and yelling. Jessie said he would have acted the same way.
Lydia tells Chima that Natalie wants Michele nominated.
Lydia: Jessie, Natalie, & Russell want to stay teammates, and that's why Natalie is after Michele.
She leaves. Chima goes on a tirade to Ronnie (** committing hari-kari)
Chima: Who should have been out there between me and him? Yes. The person hiding in the Have Not room with a stomach ache. He never wants to be in that room any other time. That makes me know that people who say they will have your back really don't. Why are Jessie and Natalie kissing his a**? I have to win HOH. I will put Jessie and Russell up.
Ronnie takes this opportunity to sing his song with a kid voice while looking at the camera.
Ronnie: I didn't do anything in the past few weeks. I didn't do anything wrong.
Same shizz different feed...
2:07 AM BBT
Kevin, Michele & Jordan.
Michele goes in to get some snacks.
Jordan: I have a feeling there is more stuff not said.
Kevin: So do I.
Michele comes out again talk turns to Cheetos.
Michele: I'm going to stop sleeping and I will hallucinate and hopefully my hallucinations will become more real than the lies in this house. (**Michele is chomping on chips which shows you her distress level)
Most of the HGs are taking out their stress on food. (**Cause sex is out. Most of them have already scr*wed themselves in the game.) Jessie and wife number two are playing pool.
2:18 AM BBT
Ronnie, Jordan, Chima, & Jeff
Ronnie (to Jeff and Jordan): I want to say goodbye as I am evicted and if you don't want to say goodbye don't approach me. I'll understand.
Jeff: I'll say goodbye... if you leave.
Ronnie: If somehow I don't leave I will go down as the person who never leaves.
Jeff: If you don't leave I will throw you out the window.
In the kitchen Ronnie is talking talking talking....
2:40 AM BBT
Michele, Jeff & Jordan are in their beds.
Jordan is annoyed by Ronnie's voice. (**He is very loud!) They think that Ronnie is "The Wizard" because he is happy. They're all bummed. They want to be "The Wizard." Jeff thinks America hates their guts.
Jeff: I'm not giving any power to this bozo. (about himself)
Jeff and Jordan think they came last in the polls. Jordan wants to ask Michele about Greenroomgate. Jeff says it's not the time. They can talk about it tomorrow.
Jeff: Tomorrow is going to be a good day. Today was the negative day of the month. Tomorrow will be a good day. Send out positive vibes.
***And that ends the smackdown mostly Overnight Report! :)
♫The roof. The roof. The roof is on fire.♫
*****No matter how much anyone updates it doesn't take the place of the feeds. Get 'em!